Every single person I come across in life is a window into another world. That which I do not know entices me, and it is that sort of curiosity that becomes caustic to my inner peace. But that never stops me... the company of strangers never ceases to be entertaining. The journey of learning what I can never understand doesn't make me sad anymore, you know. I'm learning to enjoy the impermanence of it all. If anything, it's creating a new sort of vice to deal with, a new sort of avoidance that I will now be diligent in preventing.
What I'm saving up for has changed from what it used to be, you know? I am still saving up for the lease, don't get me wrong, but now... I don't want to do a big trip. I'm looking into backpacking; I think that I might stick it out even longer to accumulate some vacation hours. Or maybe not even that. Maybe I'll skip the working stiff thing for a minute.
Bannnnd on the run, Bannnnd on the run...
That's the song I'm listening to right now. Since writing that, I'm now listening to Glory Box. This particular song by Portishead is a big influence on the current sound, y'know. There's a sort of pain, a kind of desperation and anxiety in that song that is so palpable, it's everything this project needs to be. Trip hop as a scene is so bizarre to think about, but I can't shake it's hold on me.
Bobby James is a song that completely enraptures my senses every time I hear it. I don't see how anyone could hate that song, how anyone could possibly not like N.E.R.D. Not Pharrell, I said N.E.R.D.
Yesterday I was tweaking some parts of Judy. I'm not sure about that one. I'll still include it, but I'm gonna revisit it in a few months. A few months, a few months, it's a good leeway. I'm probably not gonna have Hepburn done by the end of this year, it might be mid 2027. That's right, guys. Ha1f King might be in deep development mode for a long time, that'll just be how it is for a moment.
On my own, on my own, on my own. Putting my hands on the side of my head, focusing myself in the realm of the lay. I enjoy talking to some of my coworkers, they're incredible people in ways they'll never admit to.
I saw myself in the mirror at work and started to realize how different I look now, y'know? I'm starting to realize why so many of the old people are so warm towards me in particular, I think they think I'm 16 or something like that. In case some of my readers don't know me personally, I am 23 years old. Still very young but... I won't lie guys, I DO use this naivety to my advantage sometimes to get them to leave me alone. Maybe I am evil, who knows?
D'ya know they don't actually allow me to write these at work? Tragic.
Ibrahim has just been blessed with a child, you know... so many wonderful things happen every day. The colluding forces of hatred and greed work so hard to convince us that these things don't matter. Stuff like this, it's everything. To assemble our efforts like this, to create the conditions where beauty can flourish, that is the key. A newborn child deserves safety, food, and peace. How many in our government, Israel's government, or in any firm or organization seek so desperately to deny us the gift of miracles such as this?
It's... whatever, man. I'm gonna keep making good shit happen, you know what I mean?
I have the eyeliner on; I'm working to get it back, slowly. I'm seeing what about myself I need, what about myself don't I need. And in my heart of hearts, I realized... I feel naked without my little lion marks. So sorry to the lineage of straight people in my family, but the bloodline might end here.
I'm not smoking anymore! So now my throat doesn't feel like death. I might try it occasionally, if offered, but I'm not gonna be doing that on my own I don't think. I have to clarify, I'm talking about carts here, not cigarettes. I haven't played Trumpet in several years, so if I smoked a cigarette, I think I would die on the spot, like a Half Life NPC. To all of God's strongest soldiers who smoke cigarettes, I salute you. Hopefully you make head chef one day.
How superficial can I be, how many multitudes can I contain? So much of why I'm feeling better is because somebody hot is at work today. Being surrounded by hot people, it's like being covered in a blanket from God. This is what Jesus did with the disciples, you have to understand.
I forgot to do an ending for this one. Have a good one!
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