12/23/25 - Venus

It started to come back a little bit, today. What I've found is that I'm better at ignoring it. Im slowly learning to live in spite of my conniptions.

By "it," I mean that feeling I get every month or so that makes me feel like the worst person in the world and that I have to apologize to everybody that I know for whatever reason.

I am so much better than a Rockstar.

It's not feeling unusual to believe in myself anymore. It feels like the default of what I know myself to be. Mike Duggan is filming inside of our fieldhouse right now, and he's a lot shorter than I expected. Not that I expected anything.

There is no "what if you don't make it" sort of question in my mind. I know that it's gonna work. Whether the world wants it or not. I know that what I'm making is good. I know that what I'm making will change things. I know that I am worth so much more than what I'm getting right now.

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